Just as I was closing the door she said "Goodnight Daddy I love you"
It is really rough for me to come to the realization that my best friend YNOT will never see his niece ever again to tell her good night and witness that first hand or better yet his own son. Yesterday she was drawing a picture and she told me "Daddy I'm drawing a picture of Baby Max!" and without me saying anything she said "And his mommy Angel and his daddy Unckie" Immediately I broke down. I know she is starting to understand. With everyone crying around her a 3 year old can ketch on quite quickly. She's no dummy.
We have spent so many good times together as a family. With YNOT living in my back yard I always had an outlet to blow off some steam or just plain kick it. With lots of homies there or just him it didn't matter. Sometimes I would come back there 3-4 times a night waiting for everyone to leave. With intentions of catching him alone. There was nothing else more therapeutic (after a long days of work) then hanging with him solo, one on one. Turn the Waka Flocka down and converse for hours. About our kids playing together when we get older, Graffiti talk, sometimes I would give him girl advice, and life. The homie was a GENIUS! But human, he was not perfect and constantly needed guidance. I would try to teach him things through experiences I had been through earlier in life, and he would listen. He would teach me many of things as well. Like how to get the fullest of life, and how to go after your dreams, and don't give a shit of what people had to say. Determination! That is one of the many things that me and this kid 6 years younger then me had in common.
I owe you everything! If it wasn't for you I would not have a beautiful wife and kids. I probably would have gone back to drugs and ruined my life. That first day when ST introduced us outside of Cronies Bar in Pembroke Pines, all I was wondering was "Wow this is a little kid, Why are these 19-22 year old dudes hanging with this little shit?" Not much later to find out how amazing this 12 year old kid really was!! Luckily we didn't' go in. You probably would have got our asses kicked out.
That was history, Graffiti history, Life history!!!
We both we were at that point in our lives where we needed, for me someone to look after and for you some guidance and direction. And it was perfect! From that point on you were mine (PAUSE). Not long after that we both focused on our common ground together through graffiti. Determination!
Billboards, remember our first billboard? In Hialeah on the 826. We did hallows with thin shadow. WOW. LOL. Listening to Cormega albums back to back. Yeah, those were the 7S days. Then later realizing we really had no rank to be pushing that crew. Toys with Determination! LOL
Luckily the people around us embraced our dedication and passion. Because everyone else hated us. Its funny looking back. We came a far way, but you were always the more talented one. When Doper use to ask you to push MSG and you said "Not without my homie Dose! We're a package deal"
Chase stories. We have so many. Although running from the police was not you strong point.
The crew is torn without you. Not the same. Never the same! You played your role and it cant be filled. I hate seeing RIP YNOT's! It kills me. We were supposed to raise our kids together. Your tattoos were starting to get better and better. The last 2 weeks before you passed I started to see a major change in your mentality. You were becoming a man and I was so proud. It's so fucked up how I feel right now. Everyone tells me it was meant to be and I will never believe that. How could g-d take someone so harmless and beautiful. I'm having a real hard time. For the past 2 weeks I cant work, function, be a father and husband for my family because all I can think of is you and not having you anymore. Look at me now 2 whole weeks later and I'm just now putting together a post. I'm sorry homie. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you like I always told your mom I would. Fuck!
BUCK50! We were proud! All because of Determination. When me and Care came up with the name over a silly conversation, it was on!! All we needed was another excuse to go fuck shit up. Remember the West Palm sound wall? And the 595 Trailer, and countless others? Then we started finally turning some heads. You are the foundation. Back in the "tagging wagon" days. With the RRRRAAAPPPAAAAUUUULLLAAAAA!!!!!!! Thats crew shit. You looked up to me and felt safe through all the stupid beef. I would never take it back. Not in a million years!!
When I got back from ATLANTA we had some major catching up to do. What better way to do it then convince you to move in with me. Convincing you was easy for me tho, as you did anything I told you without a bat of an eye. You trusted me. And I did you as well (PAUSE). You watched my daughter quite frequently. And she loves you!! Every time she is in the backyard she would go bang on your sliding glass door "Unkie?!" Im SURE she will remember you. I wont let her forget. You wont either, with your reminders all over my house.
Brother, I want you to know that just as I looked out for you throughout some of the rough times in your life, Max A Million will be straight! I will teach him Determination. I GOT HIM, and your mom and grandma.
You would be proud right now. The streets are running from West Palm to the Keys, like the good old days homie. And its only begun. You are up and alive!
KING YNOTSE LIVES FOREVER!!
YNOT DOSE FOREVER!!
I LOVE YOU LIL BRO, SAY HI TO REASON!!!
GOODBYE. : (
Uncle YNOT with my daughter when she was a baby.
Buk50 Sketch by YNOT. When we put Edge down. Peep the horns!